After the tree had fallen…by Courtney

2012
03.30

Scrutinizing the green, colossal tree which had fallen on the old, rusty, ancient train track were three children. Peter, Phyllis and Roberta were wondering if they were being naughty, as they were walking on the track. Far away in the distance, on a high green hill which was as green as a pretty leaf, there stood a Russian man who was going for his morning silent and joyful walk. The Russian man was glimpsing at his charmingly new black shoes, which he polished the other day.

Roberta bellowed, at the top of her voice, a great booming “HELP!” As the Russian man looked around, he glanced up and found Roberta holding a right red cloth. It was as red as the bright sun when dawn arrives. Roberta’s face looked quite perplexed. But when the Russian man saw the tree on the track he ran over to help lift it.

As the Russian man ran over rapidly to help, Roberta said “our beautiful tree has just fallen down. I wonder what we are going to do?” The Russian man replied and said, “wel with my strong muscles and a bit of help we will be sure to lift the colossal tree up.” Next they lifted the colossal tree. So the birds and all the other pocket sized animals could smell the beautiful leaves on the vast tree. They picked it up but saw the train coming at a tortoise-like speed. The three children dropped the trees and ran off as fast as a leopard.

As the train came up to the tree, the man pulled the gearstick to make it stop. Two passengers came out of the train and helped the three children pick up the immeasurable tree off the track. After they had carried the tree off the track and up the hill the two people waved goodbye and said thank you. “If we didn’t lift the tree up my heart would have jumped out!” exclaimed Roberta. It was like an illusion.

4 Responses to “After the tree had fallen…by Courtney”

  1. harryp says:

    I like the way you have use the wow words such as collosal

  2. amber says:

    I like the way you have use the wow words such as collosal

  3. Dawn says:

    What an interesting piece of writing Courtney! You painted a great picture for me!

  4. Miss Squires says:

    *You have made such a good effort to include all the features we have been talking about! Well done for trying SO hard Courtney!

    *You have included clauses in your sentences which add detail.

    *I love the way you began your writing with the word ‘scrutinising’, it is a WOW word AND used as an ‘ing’ clause!

    Wish: To continue to read good pieces of writing so you notice what makes good writing and become familiar with a range of WOW words.

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